Is it easy to ask for help?

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Written by Jo Braid

Dr Jo Braid is an experienced coach for doctors. She helps doctors move from burnout to balance, overwhelm to owning it. She works with doctors at any stage of their career to plan for their most successful and sustainable future.

March 8, 2022

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Is it easy to ask for help?

  • In medical culture it can been seen as a weakness to ask for help. I live in a household where we are both doctors! And it has sure taken some work to get comfortable with asking for help at home.

My husband is a great guy and really happy to give a hand. My block has previously been the communication in asking him to share the load so we can divide and conquer together. But why don’t I ask for help? Is it because I know that it will get done if I’m going to do it (control)? Is it because I’m not sure how it will be done if I don’t do it?

What feelings are created when we “do it all”?

Resentment, anger, disappointment….

But this comes from our own thoughts about the other person rather than what they might have said.

 

Why don’t we ask for help? Is it a sign of weakness? Of vulnerability? That we aren’t as capable as we appear to be?

When you come across a situation where you could delegate what you’re doing, ask yourself WHY you are choosing to do it yourself. It’s worth the time to get to know yourself better and understand your motivations for the actions you take.  

Then consider what could change for you if you did ask for help? How would it feel letting someone else do the task? And what would it release you to be able to do?

It might be easiest to start with a small task – in the home setting such as in the kitchen (my kids have a roster for unpacking the dishwasher and laying the table) or some help with the laundry – I know there can be piles and piles! And if you’re in a clinical setting what can you delegate to someone else – and how does that free up your time?

 

Quite a few questions to ponder here…invest in yourself and take the time. See where that can take you!